fbpx

The Silent Treatment

By Mignon Johnson
2nd June 2020

“All games usually have a beginning, a given set of rules, and a concluding payoff. Psychological games however, have an ulterior purpose. They are not played for fun and they prevent honest, intimate and open relationships between players.”  James, M., Jogeward, D. Born to win (1996) 

One of the most important functions of maintaining trust and building healthy relationship is to manage and resolve conflict.

Silence breeds contempt.

It’s made worse when challenged by insecurity and it takes mutual communication for reconciliation to happen. This requires humility, courage, vulnerability, honesty. Some people use silence to get back, to punish the other person. Also, some people use silence as a passive attempt to manipulate the other person or control situations.

A vindictive, or punitive ploy, when used in this way is very damaging for a relationship. In a manner of, “They deserve this”, “They should’ve known better.”, “They should’ve done, said differently”, ‘I’ll teach him” etc. There are of course, other reasons, like social awkwardness, shyness, emotional immaturity, power imbalance within relationship, fear of conflict or anxiety. A thinking that some things are better left.

You will be left guessing, with a lasting feeling of “I’ll never know”.

Have you been impacted by the silent treatment? How do you use silence?
I can help you to work through a whole range of common relationship problems. If you have been impacted by uncomfortable silence in your relationships, please feel free to talk to me now.

Related Posts

Read More

Have you developed Agoraphobia

Have you developed Agoraphobia? For many people these days, the lockdown has meant staying indoors and self-isolating. Agoraphobia is an anxiety disorder that can leave people feeling housebound for years. You may have battled with agoraphobia for a long time....

Counselling for Addiction

Counselling for Addiction

Recovery from addiction One look in the mirror is all it took. This despicable, desiccated look, the hair that resembles more a crow's nest resting on top of my head. I can barely remember, this worn-out face, my voice, a lazy drawl. What has become of my skin? It's...

Counselling for Domestic Violence

Counselling for Domestic Violence

Recovery from Domestic Violence. *Clients' names have been changed to protect their confidentiality Hayley* first came to therapy in an extremely anxious state. She works full time in education and has been in recovery from a long-term abusive relationship with the...

At vero eos et accusamus et iusto odio dignissimos ducimus qui blanditiis praesentium voluptatum deleniti atque corrupti quos dolores et quas molestias excepturi sint occaecati cupiditate non provident

About the Author

Mignon Johnson

Join the Discussion

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published.